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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
At supermarket checkouts a Toblerone box makes a handy 'Next customer Please' sign for dyslexic shoppers.

Avoid bickering and petty arguments by immediately punching anyone with whom you disagree.

Re-spraying your car? Cover it with cling film first. If you dont like the new colour simply peel it off and start again with another

Save money on expensive nicotine chewing gum by chewing ordinary gum and smoking a cigarette at the same time.

Create a more relaxing atmosphere in your fridge by installing a dimmer switch.

If you want to know the time during 'Baywatch' remember to put you wristwatch on the other hand.

Create instant designer stubble by sucking a magnet and dipping your chin in a bowl of iron filings.

Girls. Don't worry about a ne dress for that important first date. All he's interested in is seeing you starkers.
 

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fingy said:
At supermarket checkouts a Toblerone box makes a handy 'Next customer Please' sign for dyslexic shoppers.

Avoid bickering and petty arguments by immediately punching anyone with whom you disagree.

Re-spraying your car? Cover it with cling film first. If you dont like the new colour simply peel it off and start again with another

Save money on expensive nicotine chewing gum by chewing ordinary gum and smoking a cigarette at the same time.

Create a more relaxing atmosphere in your fridge by installing a dimmer switch.

If you want to know the time during 'Baywatch' remember to put you wristwatch on the other hand.

Create instant designer stubble by sucking a magnet and dipping your chin in a bowl of iron filings.

Girls. Don't worry about a ne dress for that important first date. All he's interested in is seeing you starkers.
:lol:
 

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He doesn't fr*ggin' listen!
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Can't afford a widescreen TV?
Just sit 6 inches away from your current TV and enjoy all your favourite programmes in Widescreen.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Rather than carry bulky shopping bags around with me or pay for expensive carrier bags, I always eat my groceries at the checkout. Not only does this save pounds on carriers, but it has also reduced my gas bill.

Frozen Peas are an ideal replacement for ice in a cool drink when ice cubes are not available. They are just as good, and can be washed afterwards and refrozen

Fool next door into thinking you have more stairs than them by banging your feet twice on each stair.

Dont buy expensive "ribbed" condoms. Just slip a handfull of frozen peas in side an ordinary one before putting it on.


top tip for today


Fellas, play "Rodeo Sex" by shaggin your missus "doggy fashion" and then calling her another birds name. See how long you can stay on for.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
da' Fandango said:
Avoid parking tickets. Leave your windscreen wipers running while you go shopping.
classs :D

girl they are from the viz i found om on a site when i was looking for pictures of spam and tinned meats :tick:
 

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fingy said:
Dont buy expensive "ribbed" condoms. Just slip a handfull of frozen peas in side an ordinary one before putting it on.
or get yourself a boyfriend who has implants down there :eek: :D
 

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fingy said:
Re-spraying your car? Cover it with cling film first. If you dont like the new colour simply peel it off and start again with another

If you want to know the time during 'Baywatch' remember to put you wristwatch on the other hand.
:lol:

May try that clingfilm thing! :crazy:
 
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