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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Need a little help with a situation im in:

Ive met a girl, been seeing her for a month, usually once or twice a week (as she works and doesnt drive, and im a stoodent with a pub job) all has been going really well, I get on with her better than i have with a girl before, we like a lot of the same things, there is never any awkward silences, blah blah blah!

We went out saturday night, had a reet laugh, and she stayed over which was nice ;) Things have basically been going really good for this month...

Then yesterday she says she likes seeing me, that her family really dig me, shes not met anyone like me before (in a good way?!) but really doesnt want a serious relationship (i've not even mentioned it!) I dont gettit!

Im not that keen on it getting all serious and shitty (like all relationships i've been in seem to), and im happy to go along with it as is, but I cant help thinking that somehting isnt right (is she keeping her options open etc? or am i jus being paranoid?!) Dunno if it makes any sense but yeah!
 

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Keep it as it is then, it doesn't have to get serious.

Make her fall for you, then you have the upperhand, worked a treat for me, saying that, we'vr been togethor for 11 years and married for 3 :eek:
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Ballbag said:
Make her fall for you, then you have the upperhand, worked a treat for me, saying that, we'vr been togethor for 11 years and married for 3 :eek:
Thats my plan....... It seems she's been out with right nob heads in the past, the whole gentleman routine is going down rather well (I'm not putting it on, its jus a thing i do)

She is a quality girl, but i think she's been fuct over in the past...
 

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Don't worry about it then, just take it easy and tell her that's what you want. ;)

That'll make her happy and then the trust will build.
 

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Sounds like she's sounding you out, gauging how much you think of her/the relationship in general so that if she does fall for you, she knows you're not going to screw her over.

Reverse psychology works well - agree that you should take things really slow and just see how you go, and likelihood is she'll be all over you like a rash. ;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Ballbag said:
Don't worry about it then, just take it easy and tell her that's what you want. ;)

That'll make her happy and then the trust will build.
alxx_b said:
Sounds like she's sounding you out, gauging how much you think of her/the relationship in general so that if she does fall for you, she knows you're not going to screw her over.

Reverse psychology works well - agree that you should take things really slow and just see how you go, and likelihood is she'll be all over you like a rash. ;)
Cool cool! this is what i thought, but you can never be too sure!

She also said "i dont want anything serious with anyone, jus wanna focus on my job n dont want anyone stopping me from doing stuff"
Which is probably what worried me a little?!
 

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alxx_b said:
Reverse psychology works well - agree that you should take things really slow and just see how you go, and likelihood is she'll be all over you like a rash. ;)
The old "treat 'em mean keep 'em keen" game. It's a shame to have to have to play these dirty tactics but it does work, both ways.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
girlofleisure said:
The old "treat 'em mean keep 'em keen" game. It's a shame to have to have to play these dirty tactics but it does work, both ways.
doh! so its all a test then?!
 

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girlofleisure said:
The old "treat 'em mean keep 'em keen" game. It's a shame to have to have to play these dirty tactics but it does work, both ways.
tis true bloo still does this to me and im keener than ever for him :)
 

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Hmmm...I'm not a fan of treat em mean and all that...tlc for me :) It may not be a test. She may be just being honest with you. You say she's had some bad relationships in the past and that she says she really likes you etc so just go with the flow. If you don't want a serious relationship either, just take it as it comes. Sounds to me like it'll all be good in the end :D
 

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girlofleisure said:
The old "treat 'em mean keep 'em keen" game. It's a shame to have to have to play these dirty tactics but it does work, both ways.
It's not really treating anyone mean, it's just agreeing with her and giving her space so she doesn't feel trapped and is more likely to feel comfortable enough to open up to him. That way no one gets hurt, 'cos there are no expectations. A degree of pyschology does come into it, but not in a controlling way. :)
 

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That old adage "treat 'em mean to keep 'em keen" doesn't work for most women unless they're masochists.

My advice would be to work on the friendship and all the positive things of that side of your relationship you've described because that's what will keep you together. Great sex does help though!! ;)
 

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Junglist said:
Need a little help with a situation im in:

Im not that keen on it getting all serious and shitty (like all relationships i've been in seem to),
Maybe she could see herself in the big picture ;)

maybe not.
 
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