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Rodent 51 joke

881 Views 16 Replies 8 Participants Last post by  polly
Chez goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt comes to his table and asks, "What would you like, sir?"
Chez looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, "A quickie."

The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, "What would you like, sir?" Again Chez thoroughly checks her out and again answers, "A quickie, please."

This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away.

Darrenw sitting at the next table leans over and whispers, "Oi Chezl, I think it's pronounced 'quiche'."
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A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday, so during this party he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two great white sharks in it. 'I will give anything they desire of mine, to the man who swims across that pool.'

So the party continues with no events in the pool, until suddenly, there is a great splash and all the guests of the
party run to the pool to see what has happened.

In the pool is Chezand he is swimming as hard as he can, and the fins come out of the water and the jaws are snapping and this guy just keeps on going and the sharks are gaining on him and this guy reaches the end and he gets out of the pool, tired and soaked.

The millionaire grabs the microphone and says, 'I am a man of my word, anything of mine I will give, my Ferraris, my house, absolutely anything, for you are the bravest man I have ever seen. So sir what will it be?' the millionaire asks.

Chez grabs the microphone and says, 'Why don't we start with the name of the bastard that pushed me in!'
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Pyro said:
Chez goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt comes to his table and asks, "What would you like, sir?"
Chez looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, "A quickie."

The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, "What would you like, sir?" Again Chez thoroughly checks her out and again answers, "A quickie, please."

This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away.

Darrenw sitting at the next table leans over and whispers, "Oi Chezl, I think it's pronounced 'quiche'."
:lol: lmao :lol:
Pyro said:
A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday, so during this party he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two great white sharks in it. 'I will give anything they desire of mine, to the man who swims across that pool.'

So the party continues with no events in the pool, until suddenly, there is a great splash and all the guests of the
party run to the pool to see what has happened.

In the pool is Chezand he is swimming as hard as he can, and the fins come out of the water and the jaws are snapping and this guy just keeps on going and the sharks are gaining on him and this guy reaches the end and he gets out of the pool, tired and soaked.

The millionaire grabs the microphone and says, 'I am a man of my word, anything of mine I will give, my Ferraris, my house, absolutely anything, for you are the bravest man I have ever seen. So sir what will it be?' the millionaire asks.

Chez grabs the microphone and says, 'Why don't we start with the name of the bastard that pushed me in!'
:lol: lmfao :lol:
DarrenW was tinkering with Jeepers creepers when Chez came out of the house and looked into his letter box, chez looked both sides of the front door and then went in.
A few minutes later he did it again...and again...
DarrenW finally wandered over and asked what the problem
"Its my stupid computer," wailed Chez
"It keeps telling me 'I have mail'..."
Pyro said:
Chez goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt comes to his table and asks, "What would you like, sir?"
Chez looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, "A quickie."

The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, "What would you like, sir?" Again Chez thoroughly checks her out and again answers, "A quickie, please."

This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away.

Darrenw sitting at the next table leans over and whispers, "Oi Chezl, I think it's pronounced 'quiche'."
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

:D :D thats quality dude, u know me so well :lol:

damn dislexia, gets em every time :lol:
Pyro said:
A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday, so during this party he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two great white sharks in it. 'I will give anything they desire of mine, to the man who swims across that pool.'

So the party continues with no events in the pool, until suddenly, there is a great splash and all the guests of the
party run to the pool to see what has happened.

In the pool is Chezand he is swimming as hard as he can, and the fins come out of the water and the jaws are snapping and this guy just keeps on going and the sharks are gaining on him and this guy reaches the end and he gets out of the pool, tired and soaked.

The millionaire grabs the microphone and says, 'I am a man of my word, anything of mine I will give, my Ferraris, my house, absolutely anything, for you are the bravest man I have ever seen. So sir what will it be?' the millionaire asks.

Chez grabs the microphone and says, 'Why don't we start with the name of the bastard that pushed me in!'
hehehehehe u r proper on form today dude :D :lol:
Pyro said:
DarrenW was tinkering with Jeepers creepers when Chez came out of the house and looked into his letter box, chez looked both sides of the front door and then went in.
A few minutes later he did it again...and again...
DarrenW finally wandered over and asked what the problem
"Its my stupid computer," wailed Chez
"It keeps telling me 'I have mail'..."
lol :lol::lol:
Great stuff, but this is fundamentally flawed:
Pyro said:
DarrenW finally wandered over and asked what the problem
I'd just shout. It's easier :lol: :D
One day Chez walks into a Pub. The bartender says "You look like a game geezer, if you can make that horse over there laugh you can have free drinks for the rest of the night".

Chez thinks about it, then says "ok" and walks over to the horse and whispers something in his ear and the horse starts laughing and the bartender gives him free drinks for the rest of the night.

The next night the Chezy comes back in and the bartender says "if you can make that horse over there cry i will give you free drinks for the rest of the night.

So Chez walks over there and does something and the horse starts crying, and the bartender gives him free drinks. Then the bartender asks Chez what did to make the horse laugh and what he did to make him cry.

Chez says "To make him laugh I told him I had a bigger dick than he does and to make him cry I showed him".
DarrenW said:
Great stuff, but this is fundamentally flawed:

I'd just shout. It's easier :lol: :D
Pyros rule of comedy number 51. Never ever critise Pyros jokes unless you have fire exthingiuguister.
Pyro said:
One day Chez walks into a Pub. The bartender says "You look like a game geezer, if you can make that horse over there laugh you can have free drinks for the rest of the night".

Chez thinks about it, then says "ok" and walks over to the horse and whispers something in his ear and the horse starts laughing and the bartender gives him free drinks for the rest of the night.

The next night the Chezy comes back in and the bartender says "if you can make that horse over there cry i will give you free drinks for the rest of the night.

So Chez walks over there and does something and the horse starts crying, and the bartender gives him free drinks. Then the bartender asks Chez what did to make the horse laugh and what he did to make him cry.

Chez says "To make him laugh I told him I had a bigger dick than he does and to make him cry I showed him".
rodent51 said:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

thats quality dude, u know me so well :p
this statement still stands :lol: :p

:D
Pyro said:
Pyros rule of comedy number 51. Never ever critise Pyros jokes unless you have fire exthingiuguister.
Good job I have one then. It is great for putting out fireres with :D :lol:
kwality joke threadage again monsenior pyro :D
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH.......

I........CAN'T........BREATHE..........

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
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