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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I keep getting told we're really lucky to live in Cumbria but i'd quite happliy live somewhere else that isn't hundreds of miles from everything thats going on and where i can actually buy the things i want without having to spend a whole day going to get it.
Sure, theres nice scenery, clean air (ish) and cheap housing but there doesn't appear to be anything else i can see going for it.

The minimum wage seems to be the maximum wage, and the jobs that do come up that pay more usually have hundreds of applicants for them.
We can't afford to move out of the area without having a job somewhere else, and i can't seem to get a job elsewhere because i don't live in the area.

The only job i'm qualified to do i don't have the experience for and i can't get the experience without the job. :(
I can't afford to go back to college/uni to get qualified for something else.

All in all i'm stuck in a rutt which i can't seem to find a way to drag myself out of, and i'm getting more and more miserable as the days go on. We have no social life as money is so tight we can't afford to do anything.:(
I know my wife is sick of me being in a bad mood for no apparent reason but i can't help it.
I used to be so laid back and nothing life ever threw at me would faze me but nowadays every little thing that goes wrong seems to get me down.

I found myself in tears a few days ago watching Steve Irwins tribute at Australia Zoo on TV and i never even knew the guy. I didn't even cry at my grandparents funerals but for some reason i was crying my eyes out. :confused:

Something has got to go right at some point hasnt it?

Sorry, rant over.
 

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Zebedee said:
I keep getting told we're really lucky to live in Cumbria but i'd quite happliy live somewhere else that isn't hundreds of miles from everything thats going on and where i can actually buy the things i want without having to spend a whole day going to get it.
Sure, theres nice scenery, clean air (ish) and cheap housing but there doesn't appear to be anything else i can see going for it.

The minimum wage seems to be the maximum wage, and the jobs that do come up that pay more usually have hundreds of applicants for them.
We can't afford to move out of the area without having a job somewhere else, and i can't seem to get a job elsewhere because i don't live in the area.

The only job i'm qualified to do i don't have the experience for and i can't get the experience without the job. :(
I can't afford to go back to college/uni to get qualified for something else.

All in all i'm stuck in a rutt which i can't seem to find a way to drag myself out of, and i'm getting more and more miserable as the days go on. We have no social life as money is so tight we can't afford to do anything.:(
I know my wife is sick of me being in a bad mood for no apparent reason but i can't help it.
I used to be so laid back and nothing life ever threw at me would faze me but nowadays every little thing that goes wrong seems to get me down.

I found myself in tears a few days ago watching Steve Irwins tribute at Australia Zoo on TV and i never even knew the guy. I didn't even cry at my grandparents funerals but for some reason i was crying my eyes out. :confused:

Something has got to go right at some point hasnt it?

Sorry, rant over.
hope ure feeling better today! :hug:

rough with the smooth!! :hug:
 

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when applying for jobs in a different location to where you are now, we've found that putting "Actively looking to relocate" helps remind them that you're not a timewaster. Mind you, some agencies need telling more than once :rolleyes:

we met briefly at keswick gathering (ages ago)... you qualified in something alternative energy ish didn't you? (sorry memory is a tad hazy) Is there any way you could find out of somewhere to volunteer your knowledge? That way when applying, you DO have experience, just not paid experience. the other thing to consider is getting in to something which will allow you to move to wherever (hgv driving?) earn some money to cover bills and then try and find a more suitable job once relocated.

good luck
 

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Zebedee said:
I keep getting told we're really lucky to live in Cumbria but i'd quite happliy live somewhere else that isn't hundreds of miles from everything thats going on and where i can actually buy the things i want without having to spend a whole day going to get it.
know what you mean, even post takes the fucking piss, been waiting 4 days for a delivery just cos the courier couldn't find the adress on the package on friday! Now not gonna be here til tomorrow and re-test for mot should have been this afternoon!!!! :mad:
 

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Been there done that mate.
Grew up in Cleator Moor / Seascale, the rest of the family are still there and the wifes are in Dumfries.
I ended up moving down to the midlands for work (but didn't have a house etc at the time). Lovely part of the word, good to retire to, but there ain't many jobs/ services etc. I remember we used to have to do a 14 mile round trip to egremont for a chinese takeout (although the 19th century has now hit seascale and they have a fish & chip shop & a chinese - but still no pub!).
did toy with the idea of moving back that way recently to be nearer the olds and a bit of a career change as theyre really short of sparkies & plumbers apparently, but at the moment it's still too cut off for me. One day maybe...
 
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Mw and the wife are thinking of moving up to Northumberland / Cumbria / Scottish Borders to down-size the mortgage out of existence.

If they're short of electricians then way-hey.!! I'll have work to top-up my internet parts income to something we could actually live-on.!! :)

If we get loads of us up there we could start a club.!
 

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HairyYeti said:
Mw and the wife are thinking of moving up to Northumberland / Cumbria / Scottish Borders to down-size the mortgage out of existence.

If they're short of electricians then way-hey.!! I'll have work to top-up my internet parts income to something we could actually live-on.!! :)

If we get loads of us up there we could start a club.!
don't bet on all areas being as cheap as you'd like.
we live spitting distance from cumbria, but pay similar house prices to everywhere else ('cept london home counties)
 

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Hi,

I have been there too

I grew up in Egremont and like you was stuck in a rutt, any job I applied for I never got or never heard anything back from. I took a risk 6 years ago and moved down to Bolton, started a degree course at Uni while working 2 jobs just to have enough money to live.

When I finished Uni, I came back up home for 2 months (due to lack of money) while applying for jobs down in Manchester but nobody was interested as I was still living in Cumbria even though I had stated I was willing to relocate.

After getting more than a handful of rejections and some companies not getting back to me I made the decision to move back down to Manchester in 2003, thankfully my bf's parents took me in for a while until I got sorted job wise. Even getting a permanent job in Manchester is hard, they want experience but how can you get experience without a job?!!

It was one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make but I couldn't be happier, the last 3 years haven't been easy, constantly being skint, having to find a full time job , living in some horrible rented houses and having to deal with my mum been ill 100 + miles away and there where times when I nearly gave it all up.

But thankfully I didn't and I now live in Manchester with my bf and we own our own house and I have a good job.

I do miss Cumbria and having the abiltiy to drive 20 minutes along a road and suddenly be in the middle of nowhere with breathe taking views and complete silence, I do plan to move back up there when I get a bit older.
 

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Thing about Ruts dude, sometimes you have to take big risks to get out of them.

I went back to education in my mid twenties, worked two jobs to make ends meet and did my study when i could. Four years, one borderline nervous breakdown and lots of sleep deprivation later i was happier.

And now, i've made lots of changes to my life, and am moving away from a comfortable but soul destroying life to give myself a chance with people i care about.

Homeless pretty much again, will be living in a single room above the Pub for the next year or so, sharing facillities rather than in a 5 bedroom house in the home counties, but will work my way out of this one and back up again pretty soon.

You are the only one who can change your circumstances. Change is uncomfortable sometimes, but with commitment and determination you'll overcome the difficulties and have a life more like the one you want.

As with many things in life, Inertia is the enemy.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Woke up feeling a bit more cheerful today.:)
Spent the afternoon yesterday doing free stuff to my bug. Now its wound all the way down on the front adjusters and slammed 2 splines at the rear. Looks much less 4x4 now. :D
My digicam has now died so i can't post any piccies but its low.

DaisySair,
i'm hopeless with putting names to faces but i'm pretty sure we did meet at keswick.
I graduated as an environmental manager but thats not got me anywhere as you need the experience. I'm currently vounteering with the Lake District National Park on their countryside team to get some experience. I love getting my hands dirty dry stone walling, hedge layering etc. Gives me a great sense of accompishment seeing a pile of rocks end up as a wall. :)

All my applications for jobs in other areas state i'm willing to move anywhere in the country as theres nothing here tying us as we're renting.

Modder, are you still waiting for the tie rod ends?
Fancy going for a drink sometime this week? Haven't seen you or Nathan since the Maryport classic car show.

Shellbug22,
my parents live over on the east coast so theres always the option for me moving over there. There seems to be a lot more opportunities available with large towns/cities like Newcastle, Middlesbrough and Darlington within a 50 mile radius of each other.
It might be something for me to think about as i'm getting nowhere over here. Theres just hills and sheep within 50 miles of here. ;)

2-bob Monkey Mafia,
sounds like you made the right choice if its made you happier and you're getting somewhere.

My dad always said you can accomplish anything if you just put our mind to it.
He also said why do you want a VW beetle anyway, they're slow and uncomfortable and german. :rolleyes: He was big buy british guy when it came to cars. Now he drives a peugeot which is just plain wrong. :D
 

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I feel for you... I live about a mile from the beach and work with loads of people who all earn excellent money.. The problem I have is the wasters round here who still bitch and gripe about their lives when basically it couldn't get much better than they've got... ie, sunshine, beaches, splitties everywhere, and good jobs..

I'd happily ship some of them up north and you guys who want to make things better for youselves can take over from them...

Possible solution ?? :coffeecup
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Ladies luv me said:
I feel for you... I live about a mile from the beach and work with loads of people who all earn excellent money.. The problem I have is the wasters round here who still bitch and gripe about their lives when basically it couldn't get much better than they've got... ie, sunshine, beaches, splitties everywhere, and good jobs..

I'd happily ship some of them up north and you guys who want to make things better for youselves can take over from them...

Possible solution ?? :coffeecup
Sound like a good idea. :)
 

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zebedee have you tried looking for jobs down here in Barrow ?? .. a bit of travelling but many do it from here to BNFL and back everyday.
biggest cul de sac in cumbria one road in and out , but 40 mins away from the M6 to get back into the real world...but i wouldn't live any where else , but then again in full time employment. Agree on the post... 2 days = 4 days to this neck of the woods
 

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Hey Zebedee. :hug:
Lots of other people are stuck in a rutt too, there are a lot of us about mate. All I can say is that being in a nicer area doesn't particularly make things any better, it's just that the rutt you get in is a different rutt. I live in Beaconsfield (not far from 2-Bob funnily enough) and it's a beautiful old town - quaint, lots of facilities, easy to get into London, loads of lovely old pubs and restaurants, nice parks everywhere, good schools, very white upper middle class etc etc. According to friends I should be happy as Larry.
Thing is, my wife and I are getting sick to death of our jobs and would love to move away back to near our parents up North, but housing is so bloody expensive round here our mortgage is so big we can't afford to take time off work to retrain in anything else, and there's no work whatsoever in what we do anywhere except W.London, so we're stuck round here.
Our flat is so tiny we need somewhere bigger as we'd love to have a second child, but we can't afford anywhere round here big enough, so we're stuck - we can't really have anymore children. :(

Sorry for going on about myself, that wasn't my intention mate.

Here -what gets me feeling better is that I look at my beautiful wife and my incredible daughter and I think about how lucky I am. I concentrate on the good things about where I live. I have a lot of good things, and I bet you have too. :)
Maybe try and make your life where you are a bit better (that's what we're trying to do), instead of thinking if you moved away everything would be ok, because it won't. The grass is always greener, mate. :)
:hug:
 

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Decided to retrain at 29 - took the biggest risk of my life, had a good job as a Production Manager in the Automotive Industry had just got married and we were trying for a baby.

Couldn't cope with the daily grind, was heading for a nervous breakdown - Now Fluxoetine powered :incheek:.

Any way decided to retrain as a Joiner at evening college, 3 months before I qualified I was made redundant from above job, fortunately a local boat company gave me a job as a joiner on the understanding I passed, And hey presto.

Am now 35 have worked as a joiner for 3 years now, have a beautiful daughter, still married and no stress.

I know you're situ is slightly different but anything is possible if you put your mind to it.

Good Luck
 

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hey zeb , have you still got my number , give a shout if you need a natter mate , , ive been in a bit of a rutt myself , walked out of a 3 year job in may ( had to walk before i chinned the boss ) first time ive been unemployed since i was 16 ( fckn long time ) havn't had the money to do anything, it does get to you , but it wont last for ever , things will get better , , you got a bug ,bay and fran what more do you need !!!!! :) take it easy mate , and we'll catch up soon ! ;)
 

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Press ups........ 2 x set of 20 will do wonders to start with!! if you dont believe me just try it!!
ATB
 

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Hansome said:
Press ups........ 2 x set of 20 will do wonders to start with!! if you dont believe me just try it!!
ATB
that doesn't work, I tried it for a few months and still wanted to kill my customers, changed jobs and I'm now much much happier :)

though this doesn't help the thread starter ...
 

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Listen to 2-bob mate, really! anythings possible, it's a matter of how bad you want it.
I've done the same thing, I gave up being a mechanic at 25, went to college (moving back in with my old dear!) for 2 years. No money! Was dumped by my pregnant, long term girlfriend. Missed out on my daughters first year because I wouldn't leave college and get a job. Left college to do graphic design, met my now wife. Worked my arse off for 2 companies, made redundant from the last one. My old man died of cancer. Had a nervous breakdown. Started my own business. Wife got pregnant. Business went bust! (losing over a £100k in equity from our house) Started up in business again. Gonna give it another year then do something else. It's just the way it goes sometimes. Life really can be a bitch but it's how you deal with it that makes the difference.
What kind of work are you qualified to do? Why not move north, renting's getting cheaper up here because of the amount of building going on. If you need any info let me know. Plenty of work about too but get in line behind the Poles!!
One of my mate's commutes to Dumfries with his job, takes him an hour and 20. Buys a cheap diesel car from the auction, runs it til it dies then buys another.
I hope it works out for you mate but it's up to you in the end to make it happen...
All the best.
 

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If you find yourself getting in one of those moods you just cant get out of you need to tackle things in 30 min segments, press ups or exercise get the brain functioning on a different level, then read a book for 30 mins, then try going for a walk, cleaning the house, writting a letter, clean the car i know the chrome work always needs a polish,
dont watch TV it numbs the mind and make you feel worse. the only reason i say this is that i have seen a friend go through this and he then decided to deal with it like this, he now has 2 busy successful businesses, but still swears by this method. it worked for him and its free so no harm in giving it a go.
other people have said cleaning things, and others have said running (boring as hell for the first 15 mins) but then it starts to clear the head and you can think clearly.
Its only temporary and its how you deal with it that counts, 6 months down the line it wont look that bad.
good luck , it seems there are alot of people on here who have had similar experiences and they are sharing them with you to give you hope a little love and peace

H
 
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