Volkszone Forum banner
1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
25,882 Posts
i can't say i've ever had turnips. not sure what they are like. i know what they look like.

i like parsnips, but only when they are really well cooked.
 

·
Holy Calamity
Joined
·
67,033 Posts
In the battle for Ultimate Root Vegetable, which would win in a fight?

Parsnip or Turnip?

Turnip or Parsnip?

I tell you which. The answer is neither. The ultimate r00tveg is the Mangelwurzel. It has to be. ANY edible item named after that bloke out of Neighbours and that Combine-Harvester loving bunch of weirdos HAS to be For The Win.

Also, WHAT THE F is "mangold hurling"?!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,721 Posts
Turnips bloody hurt!!

My little one asked me what they felt like."dont know son" before i could finish my sentence he had hold of my nipple and yanked it round 360 degrees!

little fecker! :mad:

Parsnips for me :)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,721 Posts
DarrenW said:
In the battle for Ultimate Root Vegetable, which would win in a fight?

Parsnip or Turnip?

Turnip or Parsnip?

Also, WHAT THE F is "mangold hurling"?!
thats the great sport of eating as many mangolds as you can!the winner is the one with the biggest pile of 'hurled up' mangolds
:D
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
34,377 Posts


Baldrick: Yes, it is, My Lord.

Edmund: Then what is so funny?

Percy: Well, My Lord, while Baldrick and I were preparing the Turnip Surprise, >we< had a surprise -- we came across a turnip that was exactly the same shape...as a thingy!

[Percy and Baldrick laugh.]

Edmund: [not amused] ...a thingy...

Baldrick: ...a great big thingy! It was terrific.

Edmund: Size is no guarantee of quality, Baldrick. Most horses are very well endowed, but that does not necessarily make them sensitive lovers. I trust you have removed this hilarious item...?

Baldrick: Oh, yes, yes, My Lord.

Edmund: Good, because there's nothing more likely to stop an inheritance than a thingy-shaped turnip.

Percy: Absolutely, Edmund. ...but it was jolly funny! [laughs more]

Edmund: Yes, yes, yes...

Baldrick: I found it particularly ironic, My Lord, because I've got a thingy that's shaped like a turnip!

Edmund: Yes, all right...

Baldrick: I'm quite [?] at parties...

Edmund: [not interested] are you...

Baldrick: Yeah -- I hide in the vegetable rack and frighten the children.

Edmund: What fun... Perhaps you've forgotten that I'm meant to be having a drinking competition here tonight with Lord Melchett, and ten thousand florins are at stake!

Baldrick: Oh dear...

Edmund: What do you mean?

Baldrick: Well, firstly, you haven't got ten thousand florins; and, thirdly, one drop of the ale and you fall flat on your face and start singing that song about the goblin.

Edmund: That's nonsense. ... ... ... but just in case it's true--

Baldrick: [to Percy] It is true -- I saw it!

Edmund: Yes, all right, all right, it's true, it's true... So, the plan is: When I call for my Incredibly Strong Ale, you must pass me water in an ale bottle. Have you got that?

Baldrick: Yeah -- when you call for ale, I pass water...

Edmund: Percy, your job is to stay here and suck up to my aunt.

Percy: [tries to act suave] Ah, I think you can trust me to know how to handle a woman...

Edmund: Oh god...

Aunt: Wicked child!!! Chairs are an invention of Satan! In our house, Nathaniel sits on a spike!

Edmund: ...and yourself...?

Aunt: I sit on Nathaniel -- two spikes would be an extravagance.

Edmund: Well, quite -- which reminds me, Aunty--

Aunt: [stands up] Don't call me `Aunty'!!! [slaps him twice] `Aunt' is a relative, and relatives are evidence of sex; and sex is hardly a fitting subject for the dinner table. [sits]

Edmund: ...or, indeed, any table...

Percy: ...except, perhaps, a table in a brothel.

Edmund: [kicks Percy off his chair] Oh dear, Percy, it seems you have fallen off your chair...

[Baldrick enters, carrying a plate on which sits the thingy-shaped turnip]

Edmund: Now then, what was I saying? [sees the turnip and speaks without a pause] Oh my god...

Baldrick: [to Aunt] Your turnip, My Lady...

Aunt: [picks up the turnip, holds it in front of her, her eyes wide] Very good! Very good! [bites into it, then points it at Uncle, and speaks to him] You know, Nathaniel, it takes me right back to our wedding night...

[Uncle's eyes open wide, in surprise.]

Aunt: [to Edmund] We had raw turnips that night.,
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
Top