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'Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative'.
'Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much'.
'Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination'

All Oscar Wilde
 

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Get out of control, but appear under control. It's not bad to alarm other people, though - it's good for them.

Hunter S Thompson.
 

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Bloke I worked with had me in stitches with this one.

Our supervisor was giving us a bollocking after a slow shift and the old boy (close to retirement) was fed up with him.

Sup: "I want you to all pull together, there's no 'I' in team!"

OB: "No but there's a 'U' in cunt"
 

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A few from my Uni days

'You can't fire a cannon from a canoe' - Rex Hazeldine
Proper Preparation Prevents (Piss) Poor Performance - the 5(6) Ps.
There is no shortcut to personal fitness.
 

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"If aliens attacked from someplace else we would finally think of ourselves as all on the same team. Why do we have to wait for that?"- Dan Bern
 
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